Tony A’s “The Laundry List”
Before Dr. Woititz’s landmark research, Tony A. an adult child of alcoholic parents, developed and published his list of characteristics that children of alcoholic parents develop because of their environment.3 He named those traits “The Laundry List,” and it includes:
- Becoming isolated and fearing authority figures
- Seeking approval from others at their own expense
- Fearing personal criticism and angry people
- Developing compulsive behaviors like overeating, overworking, gambling or alcoholism
- Viewing self as a victim
- Feeling overly responsible
- Connecting easily with the feelings of other people
- Feeling guilty for standing up for self
- Becoming an adrenaline enthusiast
- Confusing rescuing or pity with love
- Inability to express true feelings
- Having low self-esteem
- Fearing abandonment
- Assuming the personality traits of an alcoholic
As a result of Tony A.’s list, other adult children of alcoholic parents began to form communities. Most importantly, people began to heal and no longer felt alone.
There are similarities between Dr. Woititz’s and Tony A.’s lists. Growing up with alcoholic parents is isolating and traumatic for children. They learn to distrust and fear adults while thriving on codependency behavior. Children of parents who were alcoholics often mature into troubled adults.